by Anna Marie Trotman
The last eight weeks have challenged us in more ways than we can possibly count. Despite the fear, uncertainty, and loss we have undoubtedly experienced, we are learning how resilient we all can be. For many of us at home right now, not only are we parents and partners, but we’re also teachers, caregivers, chefs, entertainers, and much more. All of us at TBC see you, and want to take a moment to honor all the hard work you’re putting in to take care of yourself and your family.
While we are still in this period of isolation we want to support you so you don’t feel as if you are in survival mode. Here are a few suggestions to help you stay sane while trying to balance a new way of life. This is important whether you are staying at home with kids, staying at home with a partner, or if you are single and starting to get bogged down in loneliness.
Managing Guilt
Do you have a bit of guilt about not having a routine, or are you experiencing extreme mom guilt when it comes to your kids? Some moms may be experiencing guilt around the television or other screened devices that can suck up time. However, there are tons of great resources for children’s virtual learning, entertainment and even exercise, but they all have one thing in common: a screen. The best thing you can do is let go of that mom guilt and do what works best for you and your family.
Give Yourself Permission to Let Go
This can be very difficult. So, why not create your own rule book? On those days when you look at the clock at noon, realize no one in the house has done anything – and you’re seething inside – just say to yourself, “this too shall pass,” and let it go.
Have a family meeting to get input from everyone about the new rules. Talk about the consequences and get everyone on the same page. This may take some back and forth but will be well worth it. Give it a week then discuss again in the following week. When everyone is involved in the decision making process it will take the stress off. Look at what you are willing to let go and follow through.
Carving Out Time for You
This is probably one of the hardest things for anyone who is dealing with small kids, even when there isn’t a global pandemic, but REALLY, make self-care a priority. How can you be a good mom, an effective employee, wife, or friend, if you can’t carve out some time for yourself? This could simply be taking the dog on a walk around the block (by yourself), getting in some exercise, or even waking up early to watch your favorite show alone, in peace. Whatever that moment looks like for you, put it in the rule book and make sure you follow through.
Ask for Help
You may be fortunate to have family members or friends nearby who can go out and pick up some items at the store; this may take a huge weight off your shoulders. Brainstorm with friends and family about how you can support each other. I have friends that have started a virtual book club and meet every week. You can take turns going to the store or have a virtual happy hour.
Remember to ask your spouse or partner for help. Most of us are not good at this, especially if you think of yourself as a self-proclaimed supermom or superwoman. Don’t try to do it on your own. No one can do this alone.
We’re in this Together
We are all feeling our way through this most unusual time while trying to figure it all out. Some are scared, some are using the time to find a new direction in life, some have no idea what they are doing. Take solace in the saying “nothing lasts forever.” Try to take all of this day by day and know that we will eventually be on the other side, looking back on this crazy time with appreciation for the strength we had to get through this unprecedented time in history.
If you have any concerns don’t hesitate to reach out and give us a call and we will point you in the right direction. 302-658-2229 – x115